TV Truths

My best friend has a terrible gift for getting me sucked into shows that I somehow end up spending literally days watching from Episode 1 until I'm current.  Right now, my real TV hasn't been turned on in 3 days and I'm on Season 4 of How I Met Your Mother.  It's a sickness.  Thank God for and Ipad and Netflix streaming/free 6 months of Hulu Plus - okay, the latter is thanks to Tivo....anyway.  So it's 3:30am, I can't sleep, so I'm listing the top truths I've noted from How I Met Your Mother.  These are truths I've experienced, or in some way relate to my life.  There are other truths in the show, but these are the ones that pertain to me.   Some are serious and some are funny, but all are accurate in my life.  Enjoy.

Top 30 Truths from How I Met Your Mother (up through the early part of Season 4...):

1. Men in suits are awesome and a total turn-on for women.
2. Realizing you have feelings for a good friend and the subsequent decision on whether to act on it or not can honestly be one of the hardest decisions you ever have to make.
3. I really don't think I could marry someone who didn't like Star Wars...
4. When you finally crack, it's often the friend you least suspect that is there for you.
5. A guy who's really in love can say it with just his eyes.
6. Atlantic City...is not Vegas.
7. Making up stats...kind of makes you sound like a dumb ass.
8. You don't retell stories in perfect, sequential order.
9. It doesn't matter if you're a romantic or a pathological one-night-stander - both are people at the core when you break down their shell.  Just depends on whether you use a tack hammer or a sledge hammer to get to that core.
10. You can be a 3rd friend in a relationship without being the 3rd wheel if the couple doesn't think of you as a 3rd wheel.
11. Proposing after only a few months is almost always a mistake.
12. Discuss food allergies with a significant other before you attempt to cook for them.
13. Guys who cook really are incredibly sexy.
14. You need good friends who will point out the "glass shattering" flaws your significant other has that you are blind to.
15. Poorly lit, blurry bar pictures from the past are some of the best pictures you can have.
16. Everything can go wrong at a wedding and it still be perfect.
17. New Years Eve rarely lives up to the hype.
18. Traditions are worth doing whatever it takes to maintain them.
19. Irish pubs really are the best.
20. Being nice to your waiters/waitresses is important.  They're people too and can become part of your circle.
21. It's worth it to never give up searching for The One.
22. Slap Bets are possibly the greatest invention for settling a score. Ever.
23. Always pick 10 immediate slaps over 5 long term ones.  (Didn't happen with slaps...but trust me, this is very real.)
24. Don't forget that friends really are family you just don't share a bloodline with.
25. When someone uses sarcasm and diverts their eyes when you ask them something serious, they're probably terrified of telling you the truth.
26. If a guy spends time alone with you and is acting completely abnormal, he's probably terrified because he has feelings for you.
27. Britney Speares guest starring on sitcoms only reminds you that Britney Speares is trying an ill-fated comback by doing a very poor acting job as a guest star on sitcoms.
28. Going to KU makes you realize that March Madness brackets really do translate to "March Meticulously-Thought-Outness"
29. Don't forget to make time for the passion the younger you swore a real job would only be there to support.
30. Mamma needs her sugar.

PS: I'll add to this post once I'm caught up.

Live, Laugh and Above All...Love.

Cash Money

I'm an American. I have mixed ancestry from English to German to Irish to Native American.  I'm white.  I'm a college graduate.  I'm part of a family of 6 and a family of 2.  I've been a child through 2 divorces.  I have a little extra room in my finances.  I don't have hardly any credit card debt - and none I couldn't pay off today if I wanted.  I have my own car.  I fly to different parts of the country at least twice a year.  I pay for my own gas.  I plan on being wealthy when I "grow up".  Am I considered the 1%?  It seems like I am.

I consider myself an Independent, politically, I'd like to state that before I begin because what I'm writing may seem bent on the Republican side.  I'm in the middle for most things - I've taken several online "Which Political party are you in" polls to verify that I'm not just believing this.  I really am right down the middle.  I think what I'm writing is from the vantage point of an AMERICAN.  Not a political party member, but an AMERICAN.  One who believes in the American Dream.

I feel a wonderful sense of pride about the Occupy Wallstreet protest.  On the surface, some of the things they are doing is great - they're working to start a conversation and I think that's something that's key to helping our country.  I think their determination is the epitamy of American rebellion.  We were built on a rebellion.  I always feel so American when a rebellion is going on - even if I agree with what they're rebelling against or not. I love that I live in a country where people CAN rebel and not die because of it.  I appreciate their efforts, but the stigma that people who are just slightly above middle class and higher are getting is very hard for me to agree with.

The idea that anyone that makes $100,000 or more a year is lumped in (mentally at least) with CEOs raking in 100 MILLION dollars a year...really aggravates me.  It's not the same.  Taxes are brutal for those making $150,000 or more a year.  And while many people scoff, saying they should have to pay that...consider a family of 5 with three kids in college.  The AVERAGE tax for a family head at $100,000 is 20-25%.  Okay.  So let's take $20,000 off - not counting all the other fun little taxes you get hit with.  Just that takes you down to $80,000 a year.  Now.  Consider college.  Currently an in-state school with room and board, a normal full time student is $18,000 in my state.  That's $54,000 a year.  Suddenly that $100,000 has become $26,000 a year for parents to pay a mortgage, food, clothing and everything else.  Yet, when you hear someone say, "I make 6 figures" most people lump them in with people buying boats and going to the yacht club on the weekends.

This is where the dissonance lies.

I believe in the American Dream and frankly I don't feel even remotely guilty for planning on an income of at LEAST $300,000 a year.  That's the minimum I want to make.  I'm in graduate school, paying for it myself and get help from my parents with some of my other costs.  Still, I pay for my extra years of school, I pay for food, rent, clothes...all that.  I pay for it because I work for it.  I've never thought the government needed to pull money from those who built companies from nothing or who worked to get an MBA and worked up the latter (social or company) to get where they are to support me.  I can support myself.  I should support myself.  I've never learned anything from something that was handed to me.  I've learned everything from things I've worked for.  My parents worked hard, have a minimum of a 4-year degree each because they WANT to help me and my siblings get a great start in life.  I plan on doing the same for my children.  I don't plan on teaching my kids that the government is to blame for my issues or that these evil CEOs are sucking my money.  No...it's the 55" TV you bought on credit two years ago that's sucking your money at 15% interest rate...an interest rate you KNEW was there.  And you don't get the blame the credit card company for that interest rate when it's what you KNOWINGLY signed up for if you took the 10 minutes you should to actually read a financial contract before you sign it.  I can't stand that people max out credit cards, then two years later cry on camera to the news about how the "credit companies are getting them" because their debt is now outrageous.  Guess what...don't get the card in the first place if you can't afford it.  Not rocket science.

Do I shop at Macy's, Dillards, Abercromie?  No.  I get a few staple pieces at places with amazing sales, like NY&Co because I plan on being high profile, so I have started dressing nicer to get used to it.  I pay for gas and don't make a lot of trips and carpool with my roommate for basic errands so I don't fuel up as much.  I bought a nail care system and spent an evening watching Youtube to LEARN the skills I needed so I don't need to go to the salon but maybe once a year as a treat.  I get my hair cut at normal places, not high end salons when I just need a trim.  I MADE myself install my car stereo on my own so I know how to do it rather than pay an installer for something I was perfectly capable of doing.  I do this because I'm working for what I have and I realize the power of the dollars I earn.   I gave up a lot of 4th of Julys, Christmas Eves and other holidays to work retail to sustain myself.  

I just wanted to post this to put some things in perspective.  There are things I want, but don't have...because there's not room in my budget for them at the moment.  That's what saving is for.  Rather than buying it on credit now and letting it build in interest for the next few years when I finally get enough to pay it off (and by that time have paid for it twice over) I make do with what I can afford.  I bought an ipad because I saved money from extra hours at work, christmas money and birthday money for 6 months.  I bought myself a coach purse, on ebay where I got it 1/2 price.  I don't understand why that seems so very complicated and how people see that as the government's problem when they don't follow basic logic.

I know the job market is horrible right now, that is difficult.  I'm also a victim of corporate "needs" coming before employees when I made only a $1 raise in 4 years of working retail.  I get it.  But it's reality of our situation that overspending and greed - on the part of EVERY DAY PEOPLE - has caused...not only the government.  Yes, the bailout money going to CEOs who quit the next day...I almost took went down to Wallstreet myself...but that was 3 years ago.  We made a mistake not putting in stipulations and the smart thing to do would have been to learn from it.  To go "OOPS" and reboot.  It should have put people's spending in check...instead, people blamed the credit card companies who had "variable interest rates."  I'm sorry, you should have read the fine print and educated yourself on what you were getting in to.  I think it's very unfair that mortgage companies jacked interest rates to 25% or more, I honestly do...but I'm also smart enough to know that can happen and wouldn't have allowed myself that risk in the first place.  Understand why I have such an issue with it?

I get wanting things now, but having the same people trampling others get great deals on Black Friday, then going on to talk about Corporate greed is such a discord in my head.  You're fueling the greed you're talking about.  I participate in Black Friday...but I save up all year for it.  I don't max out credit cards to get things.  I don't sign up for credit cards with a 20%+ interest rate if I plan on keeping a balance on it.  I get the free crap for using the cards (points, cashback), but don't give them any interest money because I pay it off by ONLY spending what I can afford to spend.

That is my American Dream.  Working hard so I can have the things I want by paying for it with money I EARN.  Not money I expect to get from the government or breaks I expect because I want everything NOW.  One shining stat of hope is that 65% of credit card users under the age of 35 pay off their credit balance monthly - meaning they don't carry a balance.  That is staggeringly high compared to the over 35 year counter parts.

I just want to say that I'm not ashamed for wanting to make in the 6 figures to support myself.  I'm working on a graduate degree and working at the same time to do it.  I won't apologize for it.  I refuse to feel bad for driving a nice car, having a nice house and paying for my kids' college in a few years because I earned it by working.  That's my American Dream and I'm not ashamed of it.  What's yours? Live, Laugh and Above All...Love.

Dollar Store Spa

An essential part of being a better person and taking care of yourself as a whole...is taking care of your body.  We all have stresses in life that build up, but "spa days" and manicures are always extra things, things you make appointments for, etc.  But I've found that doing them at home, on a much more regular basis has helped me be more relaxed, feel more beautiful and just more put together.  So, as promised, I'm sharing my "Dollar Store Spa" with you guys.  Not everything is found at the Dollar Store, but if it's not, you can find it for around a dollar at the grocery store.  I also have some "Extras" that are more than a dollar that are ways to make your spa even more fantastic.

Note: Depending on your time and frequency desire, you can do all of these steps together, or do them independently.  For example, I may only do a manicure once a week, but I'll sometimes do the bath 2-3 times a week.  Each step is independent, but together make for a very nice day!

Manicure/Pedicure:
At-home manicures are so easy, it's ridiculous.  Doing your nails frequently not only makes you feel good, it can really set you apart at interviews, events, etc.  Simply put - you look more together when your nails are done.  Even for men, doing the manicure and skipping the polish part makes you look more professional.

For the manicure you'll need:

• 6-piece Pedicure Set (Dollar Tree Pedicure Set)
• Items it includes for this manicure: an Orange-wood stick, nail clippers, nail file.
• 4-piece Manicure Set (Dollar Tree Manicure Set)
• Items it includes for this manicure: nail pusher, cuticle scissors.
• Hand soap (any scent) (Dollar Tree)
• Glass bowl (Dollar Tree 4" Glass Bowl 3pk)
• Lotion (any scent) (Dollar Tree)
• Chap-stick (non-menthol) (Dollar Tree)
• Nail polish remover (Dollar Tree)
• Hand cloth - on hand

Extras:

• Cuticle-Away (CVS - $5.99)

I got the steps for this manicure on youtube.  I'm posting the link, so you can watch it instead of me posting a ton of detailed steps that are more interesting to watch.  I'll post the basic steps.  I highly recommend the Cuticle-Away.  It makes removing your cuticle a lot easier, but you don't have to have it.  If you don't want to get it, just use the orange wood stick and cuticle clippers.

STEPS:

1. Fill 2 glass bowls with a drop of soap and hot/warm water.  Soak hands for 2-3 minutes, then pat dry.
2. Apply Cuticle-Away and wait 45 seconds.
3. Using the orange wood stick, run it along your cuticles and you'll see build up come off.  That's your dead cuticles.  Push - lightly - the top cuticle back as well.  After that, clip the cuticle using the cuticle clippers.
4. Rinse in bowls and pat dry.
5. Take Chap-stick and rub it on your cuticles.  Rub it in.
6. File nails starting on the edges of nails and work in.  File nails to round them.  Clip if necessary.
7. Wipe nail dust off using the hand cloth with a corner dipped in water.
8. Apply lotion and rub into hands and massage your skin.
9. Apply nail polish according to the video tutorial.  Watch the second video on how to CLEAN your cuticles if you accidentally flood them to make it look best.  It's easy - take a fine tipped paint brush, dip in acetone and wipe in cuticles to clean. Makes it look so much more professional.

Bath Spa

This bath spa is amazingly rejuvenating.  It's perfect on a hard day and some of the things I use in the shower daily (the salt scrub).   It has made my skin so much softer and fresh.  This is VERY MUCH about setting the mood.  90% of this is mental - you have to get your mind at ease.  So don't scoff at the little things, they make a difference.  There's a lot of stuff on the list, but once you have it, it'll all last a pretty long time.

Items you'll need that should be on hand:

• Comfortable PJs (on hand)
• Robe (on hand)
• Wash cloth (on hand)
• Plush Towel (on hand)
• Thick socks (on hand)
• Ipod (on hand)
• My playlist:  "Nowhere Warm - Kate Havnevik,"  "Beth - Glee," "Amber - Afro Celt System," "Breathe - Anna Nalick," "The Light - Sara Barellis," "Catalyst (Acoustic) - Anna Nalick," "Somewhere Only We Know - Keane," Selections from Enya

Items you'll need from Dollar Tree:

• Lotion (Dollar Tree)
• Epsom Salt (Dollar Tree Epsom Salt)
• Eculyptus Scented Espom Salt (Dollar Tree Relief MD Sore Muscles Soak)
• Sea Salt (Dollar Tree Sea Salt)
• Olive Oil (Dollar Tree Olive Oil)
• Yardley Lavendar Soap (Dollar Tree Yardley English Lavendar Soap)
• Glass bowl (Dollar Tree 4" Glass Bowl 3pk)
• Jar Candles (Dollar Tree Jar Candles 8")
• Bulk Luminessence Unscented Tea Lights (Dollar Tree Tea Lights)
• Bulk Luminessence Unscented Votives (Dollar Tree Unscented Votives)
• Bath Pillow (Dollar Tree)
• Collidal Oat bath soak (Dollar Tree) - comes in individual packets in a box.
• Air-tight Jar (Dollar Tree)

Extras:

• Essential oils (eucalyptus)
• Bubble Bath (Milk and Honey from Wal-Mart - big bottle for $1.88)
• Bath Brush (soft)
• Clay face mask
• Baking Soda
• Flowers if you have them
• Bath Bombs (Make your own: Bath Bomb)

Bath Scrub

Make the bath scrub by pouring 1/4 the bowl full of regular epsom salt, 1/4 with the Eculyptus scented salt, 1/8 with the Sea Salt, and 1 packet of the oatmeal soak, then pour Olive Oil in a bit at a time and mix until it clumps together.  You can add more oil if you want it to be more "oily" but don't make it so it's soupy.  You want it dry-ish so you can scoop it.  Mix in essential oils to make it smell good.  You can also add some lemon juice or peppermint extract too.  Put the bath scrub in the air tight jar.   Sometimes I also add some heated up honey.  Just play around and see what you like.

The Bath Setting

Start by making up your bath scrub and scoop a few spoonfuls into one of the 4" glass bowls and place it on the edge of the bathtub.  Do the same with the bath brush and clay mask if you have them.  Mix some baking soda and epsom salt and put them in a pretty bottle.  Get your candles and a lighter.  Get your robe, fresh PJs and clean your bathroom a little if necessary.  Fold your PJs and set them on the counter.  Hang your robe on the inside of the door, somewhere close.  Set the plush towel, folded, near the bath.  Put the folded socks beside your PJs.  Place the candles in various parts of the bathroom - enough to light up your bath area, leaving 4 tea lights out.  Set up your music, ready to just hit play.

Preparing The Bath

If you decide you want a bubble bath, the Walmart brand Honey & Milk one I suggested is fantastic.  It makes the bath feel soft and has just a very, very subtle, clean scent.  Start the warm-hot water and pour in a generous amount of the bubble bath.  As the bath starts to fill, take the baking soda and epsom salt mixture in the pretty bottle and shake it over your bath a few times.  Toss in 2-3 bath bombs if you have them.  Take a few deep breaths while you're doing this.  Blow up the bath pillow and put it in place.  Go and light your candles, placing 3-4 tea lights (after you light them) in the water (this doesn't work well with a bubble bath, so skip if you use the bubble bath).  If you have some fresh flowers, let them float in the water as well.  Set out the lotion and a fresh wash cloth by the bath.  Let the bath fill, then turn off the lights and leave the room for 2 minutes.

The Bath

Time to enjoy!  Open the door and the dark, candle-lit room is ready for you.   Press play on your ipod, then undress, leaving your clothes away from the bath to not clutter the space.  Put your hair up if you wish.  Slowly let yourself drift into the bath (be careful if you have candles in them).  Take the candles out one by one, taking a moment to think of something in your life you're thankful for, then blow them out and set them aside.  Let yourself lay back and relax for a moment.

After you've relaxed, sit up and apply the bath scrub by rubbing it all over your arms, legs, chest and neck first.  Don't rinse off.  Take some more scrub and massage/apply to your feet.  Massage as you desire.  Let your legs and feet sink into the tub, not attempting to rub off the scrub, it will melt away.  Next do your face.  Massage the scrub into your face and neck.  Finally, apply the scrub to your hands and massage as you lay back.  Lay and relax with the scrub resting on as much of your skin as is exposed for 2 songs.  Afterward, rinse lightly with water.

If you have a face mask, apply it, and leave it on the desired amount of time while you lay back and listen to the music.  If you aren't using a mask, take the Lavender soap, make it foam in your hands, and apply to your face, then lay back and relax for 2 more songs.  Rinse.

Remain in bath as desired, then lift yourself out and take the towel and pat dry.  Your skin will feel oily, that's okay.  The oil will soak in.  The longer you stay in the bath, the more it will soak in with the heat of the bath surrounding it.  Put on your thick robe.  Breathe in and out for 1 minute, focusing on the good in your life.  Take the lotion and rub it on your arms, neck, chest, feet and legs.  Massage into hands and feet for an entire song.  Put on your fresh PJs and the thick socks to hold in the moisture.

Final step: go to the sink and brush your teeth slowly as normal.  Turn on the lights, blow out the candles, turn off the music and drain the bath - then go lay down and read or just relax for 20 minutes.  This will let you relax, let the oils sink in and your mind continue to rest.

Moisture Me Up

This is a step for your body and hair to be extra moisturized and luxiourious.

Items needed (extra from bath section):

• Good, thick conditioner (on hand or at Dollar Tree - Suave) 
• Shower cap (Dollar Tree)

After the bath and you've relaxed for 20 minutes, re-apply lotion.  Take the chap stick and reapply it to your cuticles, massaging them in.

Wait another twenty minutes, then run a hot shower and wet your hair, ringing it out so it's damp, but not soaking wet.  Without applying shampoo, get your best conditioner and apply it to your hair WITHOUT RINSING.  Grab the shower cap and put your hair up inside it.  Get out of the bath and go about your night.  Leave your hair up, with conditioner in the cap as long as you can - I sleep in mine.  If you sleep in it, put a towel on your pillow.  Rinse the next morning, apply a LITTLE shampoo to scalp and rinse.  Your hair will be rehydrated and silky!  If you notice that hardly any conditioner seems to be left, you may want to repeat because your hair soaked it up.  If there's a lot left, your hair is probably pretty moisturized already.

I hope you've enjoyed my easy, awesome at-home Dollar Store Spa!!  I hope you take time to take care of yourself as I have. It's restorative and amazing!!  I hope you all take the time to take care of yourselves.  Post and let me know what you've tried!!

Live, Laugh and Above All....Love

Silence

Silence is something I've noticed a lot of lately.  Not necessarily a bad thing, but when you have silence constantly around you, there are things you begin to notice more.  You notice the clicking of the clock on the window sill, you notice the times that cars tend to go past more frequently, you notice that motorcycles make more of a presence than cars as they sweep past...and you notice how people come and go just beyond your door.  I think silence is a great equalizer in thought.  It makes people see the world more like I do all the time.  It makes people notice more.  Most people disregard little things all the time, they focus on the world just in front of them.  It's evolutionary beneficial for our species to do so.  Those who were able to set on the task at hand - ie: hunting - were more likely to survive.  For a caveman to get distracted by a pretty bird as an animal was on their trail....well, those people don't exist anymore.  Anyway, I think I got a dormant gene, and not an ADD type...but I see the world with another level than most people.  I see things I don't think others see.  I notice more.  It's not always a positive...actually, it's a very lonely type of experience...and it's one that doesn't help in school.  I got in so much trouble in elementary school for "skipping words" because my mind moved too fast for my hand.  I used to skip entire sentences at times.  Thank God I live in the generation of computers....my typing can keep up with my brain far better than my hand can.

I see the world like a writer.  May not sound that different, but writers are a unique breed...real writers.  Those of us who can't escape what many consider a gift.  Yes, I consider my skill with words a gift...but it's not always a burden I like.  Having characters in your head, seeing every day life literally in the form of another story and experiencing emotions that aren't yours...that isn't always pleasant.  It happens so I can write it, so I can record part of the human experience.  I don't know that I do it justice by any means, but something beyond the physical feels I need to be at least a mediocre medium for experiences turned into everlasting text.  Words survive.  Feelings, moments, life, it flies past...but words survive.  I love words.  I love writing more than almost anything else on this planet.  It's a part of who I am.  I'm me when I can write. I experience life so that I can write and because it makes me feel like a more whole person.  It makes me more complete to experience - the good and the bad.  Probably why I didn't make a very good, devout religious follower.  I don't believe in maintaining a "moral" life in regard to preventing experiences.  I believe in being a MORAL, good person...an honest person, but I don't believe in limiting my experiences on this Earth.  I don't think any divine being who put us here would want that.  I think we're here to experience.  And I believe I'm here to experience and record that experience.

I'm not a religious person.  I'm a spiritual person, but I'm not religious.  I question my beliefs constantly.  I believe that by questioning my beliefs, having others question my beliefs and present their own to me is the only way I discover what I really believe.  That's why I find religion so interesting.  I want to learn what motivations people have for living the way they do.  I don't know what it is that guides me when I write - a muse, a collective thought-process, a beam of energy - but something does.  How do I explain it?  Maybe it is just the way my brain is wired.  Maybe I was just born to notice more.  To feel more.  I love people that I'm not even that close to more deeply than most people can understand.  People don't understand why I get so invested.  Even I don't really know why I do.  But I meet a stranger at work and I become invested just because I sold them a sound system and talked to them for an hour.  I care about their anniversary and send them a card (from work, not personal - not a creeper...well...not always).  I remember people I meet at parties.  I remember the lady at McDonalds who told me she just found out she had breast cancer.  I remember to call waiters by their names.  I just build these connections that I crave.  I need connections.  Connections teach me so much and feel like they make me more complete.  It's a weird sensation, but for me, I feel a rush like most people only feel with their close family or friends.

The sad part is that I get invested...so when those connections break - which naturally they do at times - I feel it very deeply.  The same goes for my writing.  For those of you who have read anything I've written, you've read my feelings.  I don't just get the ideas for stories, I feel the stories.  Every time characters kiss, I feel the rush of adrenaline as I write the words.  I feel the sensation of bricks on their backs as they make out in the alley.  Every time I write a scene where someone is crying, I've cried at one point or another because of it.  I feel their pain.  I hold the emotions of dozens in me, because I'm a writer.  I can't escape it.  I can't escape that my mind doesn't want to stop - full of things I notice in the world - at night when I just want to fall asleep.  Honestly, I don't know that I'd want it to stop.  I can't imagine who I'd be without writing.  It's like breathing for me.  It's something I can't even imagine my life without.  Words give me life and they give me a purpose.  I'm here to record life as I see it.  I'm here to try to relay the ten levels of symbolism I see in a commercial to people who don't even notice the main actor.

A lot of things I've learned to put aside, not think about.  But it's a forced, learned behavior.  I can't be a philosopher all the time.  Socially, that's not exactly the best trait.  I've learned that the hard way.  Those of you who drink with me know she comes out more intensely when I drink...but what can I say, I can't stop it in those moments. ;)  What I want to get through in this post is the way that writers see the world.  For people like me, it's more than just the world, it's levels.  It's understanding metaphors, seeing a beautiful scene full of meaning and texture when you look down a downtown street lit for the holidays....it's noticing the couple sitting on the stairs with eyes just for each other.  It's connections and seeing meaning in everything.  When you walk on campus or to work...take out the headphones, or at least look around.  Stop getting lost in your to-do list and walk a minute in my shoes.  See the people who pass you, think about their stories.  Think about where they come from - because that's what I do.  I wonder.  I see.  I feel.  I see my characters in the streets as I walk.  I imagine scenes from my books playing out like movies in the trees beside me.  Just feel, breathe and experience.  Trust me, it'll open your eyes to a world that didn't even know was there.

Live, Laugh and Above All....Love.

10 Movies that Move Me

Two blog posts back to back?!  What is this madness!!! Well, I watched one of my favorite holiday movies...one of my favorite movies actually, last night, so I wanted to discuss a few movies that move me.  These are not always my absolute FAVORITE films of all time, but they're ones that pull an emotional response from me.  Usually, there's at least one scene where I almost have to stand up I get so excited...or at least curl into a tighter ball and grip a pillow in anticipation.  So here it goes.  I'd love to hear your opinions as well.

I'd also like to note, these are in no particular order...


#1: Kate & Leopold

Alright, so I love this movie.  I think it's the combination of Hugh Jackman...1800's Hugh Jackman...a romance kill for and Meg Ryan, whom I adore.  The scene where Leopold puts on the beautiful rooftop dinner for Kate as an apology and she vents about her disbelief in love, I think is wonderfully done.  It intertwines this terribly romantic gesture with a viewpoint on love that a lot of powerful women have.  It's also Kate's realization that maybe she thinks love is a "grown-up version of Santa Clause" because she's afraid she might never find it.  When she does, things have to change in her mind.  Their day together and how they talk about it being slower - but a good slower - I've had days like that and know exactly what they mean.
Leopold also has an incredibly beautiful line in this movie: "Marriage is the promise of eternal love.  As a man of honor, I cannot promise eternally what I have never felt momentarily."
Scene that takes my breath away: When Leopold goes French and quotes La Boheim to Kate's co-worker. 


#2: The American President

This is a movie I can turn on pretty much any time and I enjoy it.  Michael Douglas is hilarious and the romance I think is believable and well constructed.  I also love this story because it reminds me of my trilogy I'm writing - even though there's little plot similarity, the characters remind me of mine.  It's almost a film about innocence in love, yet the people are two driven, powerful leaders.  They still have those kid moments of being in love.  It's adorable and has a well done "breaking point" for their relationship.
Scene that takes my breath away: When they're in "The Dish Room" and he goes "As a lobbyist, you'd never be alone in a room with the President..."


#3 Love Actually

This movie is simply brilliant.  I watched it again last night (it's my "holiday staple" movie I watch alone - no one else seems to like it that much - at least 2-3 times during the holidays) and I was reminded of how much I love it.  Especially in the throws of writing screenplays...I appreciate the story construction so much more now.  This film makes you feel for a lot of characters in 2.5 hours.  Impressive.  The connections are also positively brilliant.  There are a lot of scenes in this movie that makes me smile.  I LOVE the movie stand-in couple who are so adorably shy with each other...yet they're completely naked, pretending to have sex most of the movie.  I love the relationship between the stepdad and his son - it's so amazing to watch them both heal.  The scene when the best friend/artist shows up with signs and a boombox...omg I almost cry every time that scene comes on because it's the ultimate unrequited love story.  And of course, I simply adore the PM's relationship with his assistant.  So adorable and hilarious.  Plus, it has a great line: "Love actually IS all around..."
Scene that takes my breath away: When the little boy is running to get Joanna before she gets on the plane.
Scene that takes my breath away: When the curtain falls and the PM and Natalie are kissing.
Scene that takes my breath away: When the Pop Star realizes his manager is the love of his life.


#4: Pride and Prejudice (the 2005 version)

Where do I start.  Um, I love Mr. Darcy.  It's a little absurd.  He's honest, loyal and will do anything for Elizabeth.  I love this movie because it's beautifully blended as far as the music, cinematography and dialogue. The ballroom scene is simply wonderful.  I thought both leads did a great job of making you feel their love, which is why I love this movie.
Scene that takes my breath away: When Mr. Darcy comes out of the fog toward Elizabeth and goes "You have bewitched me, body and soul."




#5: Slumdog Millionaire

This movie I adore because it's so well crafted.  I love the idea of fate that this movie really brings to light.  Everything happened because "it is written."  Not only were the colors simply fantastic, the construction of the story and the characters, but the setting was great.  It was at times beautiful and other times horrifying.  I can't say enough about how much I love this film.  Any time I need to believe in fate, I watch it because I believe that everything happens for a reason.


#6: Becoming Jane

Aside from the fact that I think James McAvoy is possibly the most brooding, unbelievably hot man on the planet...this movie was excellent.  There are a few scenes that are just so well acted, it makes me all silly inside.  I'll post the three that I think are really amazing and that will pretty much get the point across.  The dance scene literally makes me gasp every time I watch it.  You feel so much heat and tension just in their eye contact...ugh, why don't we have REAL dances like this anymore?!?  That moment when they first turn and see each other...oh, I'm in love.
Amazing Scene 1: The Library Scene - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DiIgAES9zt0&feature=related
Amazing Scene 2: The Dance Scene - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qfZm5rfQP7o
Amazing Scene 3: The Forest Scene - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVOsO0E1E34&feature=relmfu

#7: Rent

Okay, a lot of reasons I love this movie.  First...it has music that is very meaningful to me.  With my freshman choir at Marcos, we all became a family singing "Seasons of Love" at the end of the year.  Because of that, I've fallen in love with the story and remember how connected I got to the people in my choir singing that with them.  As for the movie itself, I thought the filming was fantastic.  The candlelight, the mood, the dark overtones...incredible.  And the music was great.  I got to see Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp live doing Rent and I thought this movie captured that essence.  I remember leaning over to T and going "It's like the soundtrack, only live!"  But in the film itself, the scene with Angel - mostly his death - just chill me to the soul.  I can't help but tear up every time they pan around the room and slowly the group therapy people fade away...absolutely amazing.  This is the movie I go to when I need to remember those in my life who matter.  The people I consider my family.
Scene that takes my breath away: The opening with Seasons of Love in spotlights.
Scene that takes my breath away: "La Vie Bohem"


#8: The Count of Monte Cristo (2002 version)

Told you this was in no particular order. :)  This movie is usually at the very top of my favorite movies of all time list.  It has everything and just hits me with the power of this one man.  The story is moving, rich and has deep characters (except I don't think the actress who played Mercedes really did her justice...sry).  I think this movie is so rich on many levels.  You see friendship turn to hatred, love turn to jealousy, enemies becoming allies, criminal turns noble and a politician who falls from his deeds.  I simply adore James Frain and he plays a wonderfully hated character in this movie.  Overall, it's just packed with moving moments and shows what the human spirit can accomplish.  Plus, it has one of my favorite lines of all time "Kings to you Fernand..."
Scene that takes my breath away: When Mercedes shows up at his house and he screams at her not to take away his hate.


#9: Apollo 13

Not exactly sure why, but I freaking love this movie.  It's one I can watch no matter what mood I'm in.  I love how this captures such a pivotal event in American history.  It was a moment where the entire country felt connected in hoping for these three men to survive.  The American spirit in me really comes out with this movie.  I also love all the areas you see: the crew, the control center, the family and even the engineers (totally see my dad in there!).



#10: Anonymous (2011)

I went into this movie expecting to completely hate it.  As an English Lit major...I've heard all the crap about Shakespeare not being Shakespeare and for the most part, I would fight like hell to defend him...so I thought I'd feel the same way about this film.  Hell no.  This movie is just down right impressive.  Not only is the story plausible, but the acting was unreal.  It moved me because as a writer, I understand the labor of love and the agony of being a writer that it takes to create works.  Then to never be able to have your name tied to them?! How horrible.  I really felt for these characters and found myself completely connected with the "real writer" according to the movie.  I won't give away who they say it is, but his lines about what it's like to be a writer are simply amazing and so true.



So there you have it.  10 movies that move me.  Please leave comments with your own movies that move you and thank you for reading.

Live, Laugh and Above All....Love,

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays.

      This time of year is magic.  I don't know if it's the crisp chill in the air, the decorations, the music or just a vibe in the air, but I really love it.  I think the part I love most about this time of the year is that people seem to actually care about one another.  The constant reminders to love thy neighbor, the bells ringing asking for us to give, I think that's what keeps people in the giving mood.  It's the time of year when you can see tangible efforts people put forth to make the world better.  I see the giving spirit all year because of the sorority I'm in, the service sorority...but most people don't see that all year.  So I think that buzz is what the world would be like all the time if people were less selfish.  I honestly believe there is good in everyone.  I search for it constantly.  Even when people are cruel, make poor decisions or are just flat out mean, I still look for the good.  Instead of looking with hate, look with good and think about the influences that caused the action.  Maybe that's the real definition of a person, not just a collection of not so great actions.

     That's what I think the core of this time of the year - the holidays - is all about.  You get around family, remember just how screwed up most of them are and love them all the same.  Once you get back to your real life, that sticks for a little while.  You start to look at the people around you and wonder if the same goes for them.  You think about them with their families.  Maybe someone really dark and ugly to you is warm and beautiful to their family.  It's a time for families.  I personally, have an incredible family.  Sure, all of us have our flaws, me just as much as any one else.  But we all work very well because of our differences.  My brother Alex is charismatic to the core.  He could charm anyone, anytime, anywhere and sometimes I think he does it just to test himself.  That works so well with our family because we are all extremely opinionated and sometimes - a lot of times - we need someone like Alex to come in, charm us all with humor and we're busting up laughing 10 seconds after we've been screaming at each other.  How do you not crack up when an 18 year old walks through the living room with no shirt, then strikes a Victoria's Secret pose and owns it?

      Then there's Garrison...he is an incredible example of what a human being should be.  Not only is he kind, loving and always there for anyone he's ever encountered, he's just honest.  He's the one we know will always handle things diplomatically and will make sure everyone is taken care of.  He keeps us stable.  Next is Olivia, my sister who has had many challenges in her life, but has never let them get her down.  She shows us all how to keep to our own and represent who we are no matter what.  She's also probably the most motivated in life.  She knows what she wants and won't stop until she gets it.  Most people think they are this driven, but 99% of people are not.  She's one of the 1% who will fight, claw and pull herself to the top.  Finally, I'm the last kid here to be mentioned.  I'm the organizer and the observant one.  When we need to organize a gift for the parents...I'm the one working on it in September to make it perfect and get the other kids involved.  I'm the one who spots potential road hazards and vocalizes them at least 6 months before anyone else does.  I take care of things.  I make sure things are in order.  I make things happen.  My parents of course are important as well.  My stepdad is Mr. Tradition when it comes to the holidays and has made me love them so very much. He remembers what candies are "traditionally" in stockings each year, even if the rest of us have no clue what we got the year before.  He's also always there with the family movie and calling us all to make sure we are home to watch our holiday movie.  My mom is the creative one.  She makes the holidays hilarious with prank gifts, funny notes and gifts that are usually right on the dot for what we want.  It's impressive.  We can mention something in April and completely forget about it and somehow she remembers and it's under the tree.  She also works to make the holidays nice.  She gets us in nice attire, wraps presents well and makes my other sibs step up.

    The other members of my family that make this holiday special are my dad and my BFFs - whom I consider family.  My dad isn't a big holiday person, but he's someone who you get to see smile when I make him do things for the holidays he wouldn't have thought of.  For example, my grandmother, we found out, ate a thanksgiving meal alone at home - she had a turkey sandwich.  We all assumed she was with church friends, but once we found this out, I made my dad fly to Missouri every year to be with her.  Four years later when she got dementia and had to be moved to care centers...he thanked me for making him go and get that time with her and the rest of the family that would come up because he was in town too.  It's things like that that make me remember why the holidays are so important.  Finally, my BFFs, all of them, make me feel loved when they think of me with a card, a call or a small gift.  It's just a reminder that people love you beyond your blood family.

That's all I have for now on the magic of the holidays.  I hope anyone reading this takes the time to think about how your family impacts your life not just during these few months, but all year.

Live, Laugh and Above All....Love.

The Transition of People

One thing that I always find interesting is the way people drift in and out of other peoples' lives.  I try to maintain relationships, make sure that I stay with them as long as I can...but then I stop and wonder about some relationships in my life.  As I've grown and matured, I had to realize that some friendships, some relationships, were not worth keeping around.  Simply not worth the effort it was taking to maintain them.  Yet, why is it, that even when relationships drain you and become even toxic at times to your mental health...it's so hard to break away from that.  Why do we cling so hard to the past with people who have changed?  We all grow, learn and adapt...so why is letting go of those people who were part of your life when you were a different person so challenging?  I, for one, feel that I am only continuing to become a better person.  I don't long for the person I was in the past, yet I've found myself recently having to let relationships go that I have held on to for far too long...yet even now, releasing that grip, it's easy.  It's like sitting in the waves at the beach, holding on to a board and finally letting it go and drift into the sea.  When I'm finally able to release, I still want to run into the waves and swim like hell to grab back on to it as I watch it drift out until there's nothing left but waves and the sky. 

I think part of the reason I've clinged to relationships that I've known have been truly dead for years is some sense of connection to a younger self.  Like losing those friendships will somehow end my early years in life...when really, I don't want to hold on to those anyway.  I don't want to sit in high school anymore, or in the cafeteria during middle school and gossip about Backstreet Boys.  I want to go to bars, dance, have a career, meet interesting people and find my great love.  So why is letting go so damn hard?  Maybe there's still a part of us that's scared to let go.  Will we find friends that fill the void they left behind?  Did they even leave a void?  I know for some of my experiences, I'm left healing a void rather than creating one by just letting go.  By embracing the new and trusting that things will be okay...I heal and recover from the damage created by the person I was and the people I had in my life.

I see so many people doing "facebook purges" recently and I wonder if cutting those ties is as hard for them as it is for me.  I've done purges, but rarely announce it. For me, it's something I have a hard time being happy about.  I think it's a positive, but not exactly something I want to announce.  It's clicking to confirm that a person is no longer relevant in my life.  It means I've grown, I've changed, I've adapted.  But that isn't comforting for me when I click Remove....

Just something to think about next time you think about a long lost friend or go through a facebook purge.  It's likely a good thing - a reawakening in yourself and realizing you've got so much life ahead...but it can also be sad and scary.  Just make sure you're only losing the ones that are toxic and pulling the positives back into your life rather than losing them to the abyss along with the bad.  Sometimes those positives from the past can be exactly what you need to become the new person you're supposed to grow into today. :)

Love - Or Something Like It.

Why does love literally make  us crazy?

The science of love absolutely fascinates me.  How can it not fascinate most people?  Can science understand how we fall in love?  Why we fall in love?  Who we fall in love with?  While I do believe there is some magic when you find "that person" who shares your interests, goals, future aspirations and makes your heart feel like it's on speed...as a scientist...I know that there's more to it than just that magic.  There's something chemical, primal even.

In an article about addiction of love, I read the following:

"In 2000, Andreas Bartels and Semir Zeki of University College, London, located the areas of the brain activated by romantic love. They took students who said they were madly in love, put them into a brain scanner, and looked at their patterns of brain activity. The results were surprising. For a start, a relatively small area of the human brain is active in love, compared with that involved in, say, ordinary friendship. “It is fascinating to reflect”, the pair conclude, “that the face that launched a thousand ships should have done so through such a limited expanse of cortex.” The second surprise was that the brain areas active in love are different from the areas activated in other emotional states, such as fear and anger. Parts of the brain that are love-bitten include the one responsible for gut feelings, and the ones which generate the euphoria induced by drugs such as cocaine. So the brains of people deeply in love do not look like those of people experiencing strong emotions, but instead like those of people snorting coke. Love, in other words, uses the neural mechanisms that are activated during the process of addiction. “We are literally addicted to love,” Dr Young observes." 

So essentially - love is an addiction.  Now I know most people reading this are going "Um, yeah, why else would a guy spend ten hours coming up with the perfect Valentines' Day gift to impress someone all his friends deem a real bitch?" but think about it - do we really think about love as an addiction like we do drugs?  Of course not, because it's the way we bond and reproduce the species.  But if it has the same chemical effect on the brain - makes us act in ways that we might not otherwise act...why don't we take it  more seriously as an addiction?  

I know so many people who are addicted to being in love.  That rush, the intoxication of knowing that even if only for a few months, you are the center of someone else's life...that's certainly something to get addicted to.  I'm not saying it's wrong.  I love love!  But it's just something to think about.  Some people crave it so bad they will be with people who treat them horribly, who are outwardly just bad people or they will hook up with someone they barely know and jump in with both feet into the deep end of the pool. That part is hard for me to understand.  The part where people stay in bad relationships, or trust their hearts to a stranger.  Why do we risk that just for a little feeling of euphoria? Why do we take those leaps when 99% of the time those fail? Is the feeling, the addiction really that strong? 

I know I write about love - real love.  I also write about lust and relationships that seem like love, but aren't.  It's one of the things I love best about writing.  It's the passion, the hate people feel when they love someone so much they don't know what to do without them. Two of my characters in one of my books love each other so much that it turns almost into hate.  It's so fun to write.  I love writing about love because I get to experience it, but it's at a distance, because it's my characters, it's not me.  Sometimes it sucks, when I feel it, but there's no one there for me to express that love to, but other times, it's cool because I get to express it in words and preserve it that way.  I get to write about love in a way that hopefully makes readers drift into it for just a few minutes...get to disappear.  So in that instance, love, the addiction, is great for an escape.

Personally, I firmly believe men do not fall in love as deeply as women do.  Sorry guys, just a personal belief based on observation.  Not saying guys don't fall in love - I think they do - just not to the extent women do.  Again, scientifically it makes sense why, and I won't go into a whole explanation, but essentially, women from Day 1 of our existence needed men to be able to survive while carrying a child to term.  Before commercialization and cheeseburgers a drive-thru away, women couldn't gather enough net calories to sustain themselves and child without a partner. MEN on the other hand...well, their work really is done in 15 minutes. So biologically, it makes perfect sense that women develop stronger attachment.  But why aren't women more aware of this fact?  Why don't women take their feelings of utter rapture they feel over a guy they barely know as maybe just a rush of chemicals?  I know it'd save a lot of heartache.  Guys, feel free to weigh-in on this subject because I don't understand your side of the coin on this.  Because I have known people who are literally perfect for one another, the girl is all in, and the guy is like..."eh". I've seen it more than once as the observer of my friends and acquaintances that I am. 

Now, to be fair to the above paragraph...sometimes girls see perfection that isn't there. Actually, girls FREQUENTLY see perfection where there isn't any. That I can attest to. Been there. Done that.  You feel completely stupid when reality finally snaps in front of your face and you can see the flaws through the perfect glitter that has been clouding your eyes, but for some reason, when you're in that mode...all the little fuck-ups seem to disappear and the one GREAT thing, that gets a damn spotlight.  Again, I've been there and I can't explain it because I consider myself of at least average intelligence, and thus feel I should be immune to such stupidity.  But I'm not.  Rush of chemicals.  That's what it has to be. 

I'm not entirely sure what the point of this post is, but I think I'm just searching for answers about love and attraction right now.  It's something I am fascinated by because I see it all around me, yet I can't fully understand it.  It's one of the few mysteries in life - at least for me.  I feel like even if you've been really in LOVE (not just in LUST or ATTRACTION, but LOVE), I think it's still a mystery.  I've seen people in my life do incredibly stupid things because they claim "I was in love" as if that absolves them of any responsibility.  Given that the chemical receptors in the brain light up the same way they do when you're on drugs...makes some sense...but still.  I don't understand why people make sure huge, radical mistakes, sacrifice so much of their lives, give up hopes and dreams....for love that doesn't work out!  For someone you KNOW is love of your life, someone who is there no matter how bad things get and someone who you've never had any real concern that they would leave...I get that. I'd go to the ends of the Earth for someone I loved like that.  But when that person you're in love with has hurt you, destroyed you, left you emotionally bleeding on the sidewalk as they walk by smiling...how you can give up so much of your life for THAT person...that I don't understand.  And I never will.  

I hope this didn't come across as pessimistic about love.  It's not meant to be that.  It's meant to search for understanding.  I'm trying to find answers.  I'm trying to find real, honest love.  Not just stupid relationships.  Real, honest to God, love.  Because that's not something I have right now - it's something few people, I think, ever really have - I love learning and trying to understand it.  Sure, I can experience these great relationships that maybe will turn into love...but for the moment, I'm without it. I'm trying to understand.  Which I guess makes me an optimist about it - because at least I don't think love is a myth. 

So help me understand.  Leave me your love experiences, comments, etc.

Live. Laugh and Above All, Love.

The Song Beneath The Song

Yes, I stole the title from a song, but I wanted to talk about lyrics.  There are 2 types of people in the world, I'm convinced.  One who listens more for the melody in music, and one type who listens for the lyrics more.  When it comes to great music, I'm more about the lyrics than the music.  Not surprising since I knit words together to express myself and create worlds, but none-the-less, lyrics are the center of a song for me.  Don't get me wrong, I love the melody and if the melody sucks, I'm probably not listening to the song...but like love and sex, it's just better when the two go together.  Stealing this somewhat from a movie (but expanding on it), but I feel it's a completely accurate analogy: melody is the sex - it's the heat, the immediate passion, the intoxicating allure that you first think of....the lyrics are the love.  Lyrics are what happens when you sit, listen to the song and think about it.  Same in a relationship.  Sex is the appeal, it's the primal attraction we have to the opposite gender.  When we all think of a potential partner, EVERYONE thinks of sex with them.  You can't help it.  It's a mix of that mystery, the suspense and of course all the potential pleasure associated with great sex.  But getting to know someone beyond that physical bond....that's when you start to know if you could love someone.  Not that fairytale romance crap that Disney pounds into our minds, but real love - finding someone you share interests with, have a connection with, can't get out of your mind and love spending time with.  That's the lyrics for me. It's the relationship you form with a song.

So a few artists really capture my lyric love - John Mayer, Anna Nalik, Michael Buble, Taylor Swift (shut up, every girl has experienced the emotions she portrays), Vertical Horizon, Dave Matthews Band and Sara Bareilles.  These people do more than make nice music, they capture moments in life.

John Mayer
John Mayer is an incredible poet.  Here are a few of his verses I just melt with:


Your Body is A Wonderland
"We got the afternoon/ You got this room for two/ One thing I've left to do/ Discover me/ Discovering you"
Okay, this is just hot. The way he portrays such a simple idea: spending the afternoon with someone you can't get out of your mind...wow.  And it's a perfect phrasing: Discover Me Discovering You - because that's what's makes those moments, feeling every inch of someone else's body, getting that connection and just losing yourself in the new.

3x5
"Today I finally overcame/ Tryin' to fit the world inside a picture frame/..../You should have seen that sunrise with your own eyes/ it brought me back to life/ You'll be with me next time I go outside/ no more 3x5's"
I love how this song captures the difference between experiencing something with someone verses seeing photos of it.  We all share pictures with people, but nothing can replace the physical connection of being there together.  No video or picture could replace laying in the grass next to one of my very close friends, feeling the cool breeze across our faces and staring into the night sky at the stars. 


83
"If my life was more like 1983/ Plot a course to the source of the/ Purest little part of me"
Aside from the awesome word construction, this song just so well captures remembering being a child again.  Sometimes you just need to stop, and revisit who you were before the world changed you.  I love the way he articulates that.


Half of My Heart
"I was born in the arms of imaginary friends"

Growing up primarily as an only child, to me, this hit home a lot.  I grew up relying a lot on my imagination to keep me occupied.  Be it on the farm where I would disappear into the pastures and pretend I was adventuring into an unknown world or at home where I would be on a "boat" made out of my blanket and trying to find land...I lived in my head.  And this just really spoke to me.


Anna Nalik
One song of hers in particular really speaks to me as a writer.

Breathe (2am)
"2 AM and I'm still awake, writing a song/ If I get it all down on paper, it's no longer inside of me,/ Threatening the life it belongs to/ And I feel like I'm naked in front of the crowd/ Cause these words are my diary, screaming out loud/ And I know that you'll use them, however you want to"
As a writer, I don't know if anyone else experiences the consuming passion of certain things that need to be written, but this pretty much says it.  There are times I can't sleep and am in so much pain I have to write a scene, add to a book, etc just to get it out...then it will let me rest and relax.  It's more than just an idea.  For a writer, it takes over you.  You take on the emotions of your characters and in some ways, it's a gift and a curse.  This captures the curse side few people see.


Michael Buble

Not only does he have a buttery voice, but oooh, the words.

Haven't Met You Yet
"I might have to wait, I'll never give up/ I guess it's half timing, and the other half's luck/ Wherever you are, whenever it's right/ You'll come out of nowhere and into my life"
What I love about this phrase is how it captures both anticipation and excitement and hope for a future relationship.  Most songs are written about being IN LOVE or being out of love...this one talks about the thrill of waiting for it. 


Taylor Swift
Even though she's not melodically the most versatile person on the planet, she does do a good job with lyrics.

The Story of Us
"Braced myself for the good-bye/ Cuz that's all I've ever known/ But you took me by surprise/ You said I'll never leave you alone."
What I like about this is that it shows a REAL relationship.  Not one fueled by stupid drama, but the moment you know you're with someone willing to work on the relationship as much as you are.  The moment that it stops being just a silly hookup to being in a relationship where you both will move past the fight.


Vertical Horizon

A couple of their songs really speak to me...

Everything You Want
"I am everything you want/ I am everything you need/ I am everything inside of you/ That you wish you could be/ I say all the right things/ At exactly the right time/ But I mean nothing to you and I don't know why"
Okay, this one I have to say just literally takes the words out of my mouth sometimes. I'm an absolute expert when it comes to being the perfect best-girl-who-is-a-friend and I love friendships I have because of it.  But there have been times, when I feel just like this - I'm sure everyone has.  Where you know you're perfect, you are awesome and you fit...but it just isn't there.  I think how they express this in the song is brilliant.


You're A God

"I've got to be honest/ I think you know/ We're covered in lies and that's OK/ There's somewhere beyond this I know"
This song really well captures the reality of life.  We all are messed up, we're all flawed...but if we believe, then hopefully we'll find something beyond.




Dave Matthews Band
I love this guy - great melodies that are different and awesome to drive around listening to.


Ants Marching
"All these cars and upon the sidewalk / People in every direction/ No words exchanged/ No time to exchange/ When all the little ants are marching/ Red and black antennas waving/ They all do it the same/ They all do it the same way" 
This was a phrase that literally has changed the way I live my life. I was singing along and realized what the lyrics were saying about life today and it was so accurate.  We are like a bunch of little ants, not taking the time to communicate with each other...but we're all around one another.  I've made it a goal not to be an ant.  I look at people, talk to the lady who gives me my food at the drive-thru and just try to get to know the people in my world.

Sara Bareilles

I cannot articulate how much I love this woman's work.

The Light

"Never mind what I knew, nothing seems to matter now/ Ooh, who I was without you, I can do without"

How incredible is this sentiment? Realizing how much better of a person you are with the partner you have now...oh my God.  I've felt this way around friends, but I hope to find this in love.  I hope to find someone who I literally am a better person because they're part of my life.  This just gives me chills.

Gravity

"You hold me without touch./ You keep me without chains./ .... /  Set me free, leave me be. I don't want to fall another moment into your gravity."

Yeah, we've all been there. You are literally addicted to another person and even if logically you know you need to sever yourself from them...there's a gravity there you can't break.  All you want is to be free, not feel this way, be rid of that feeling of anguish because they don't want you...yeah...this is exactly what it is.  A cosmic, emotional gravity you can't escape.  

 

 

 

These are just a few of the lyrics I love and why I love them.  I think when you discover real meaning from lyrics in a song, it can honestly change the way you live.  It can help you express yourself in new and fascinating ways.  It helps you see the world differently and makes you realize someone out there has felt what you are feeling now and that in itself gives you hope.  

Please feel free to post comments or write about your favorite song and lyrics in my comments section!! 

Live. Laugh. And Above All...Love.

My next hit.

I'm an addict.  I'm looking for my next hit in life.  These words are creating that hit.

I've decided to blog.  Not sure how this will turn out, but I'm doing it.  With all my friends scattered around the country, I want to give them a way to see my rants and carry on discussions with me about them.  Right now, I have no idea what will come of it.  Will it be witty remarks or craft tutorials or comparisons between history and modernity or passionate scenes from inside my mind?  Who knows.  Probably a large mix of all of those things.  I'm not a journal keeper, but I do like to have a public place to share my thoughts.  Some place that's mine.  Some place my writing can go other than between the pressed pages of a tattered notebook on my bookshelf.

Why am I blogging now?  Well, I'm sitting in a Starbucks on the beautiful Country Club Plaza in Kansas City.  One of my favorite places to go and think.  I love the simplicity, the quiet energy and the intricate details of the architecture around me.  It's an inspiring place.  I'm also working on a project that could - for real - lead to me realizing my dream of being a professional writer.  Once things get solidified, I will share what I can, but for now, just know I need to be inspired.  That's perhaps what's leading to this.   I'm aching inside, trying to pull creativity from my mind on this project that's so new and needs to be produced so fast.  Other projects, other characters are making my chest hurt with pain that I should be funneling into their story, but I need to do this other one first.  And for that, I need inspiration.  In the project I'm venturing into a world I know so very little about.  Rushes I want to feel, need to feel to be inspired and write from the vantage of someone with experiences I've only imagined.  Experiences few have truly felt, but most have at least can somewhat relate to.  I can on some things, the things most people can...but other things.  I feel so ignorant.  As a writer, I can feel and experience things in my mind to the point of almost physical realization - but some things are more than just one sided and those can be hard to replicate, even with an imagination like mine.  Inspire me.

Music is playing its part in inspiration, and if anyone has suggestions...please post them.  I'll listen to anything at least once.  Send me inspiring titles and artists.  Driving down the highways, my windows down and forcing fresh air into my lungs with music so loud it shakes my car...I can disappear and become inspired.  I can feel what others feel, I can think what others and I can divorce me from myself for a few moments as the road disappears from below me and I drive toward an unknown.  So, inspire me.

My life recently - in the last 4 months or so - has reverted back to the real me, a person who has laid dormant for a very long time.  And now, I'm thirsty for life and experiences again.  I'm craving that which I've never felt, had, tasted or touched.  I'm an addict looking for my next hit.  I need it, strive for experiencing the new, testing my limits and pushing myself.  This is an experience, sharing my thoughts on an organized soap box composed of invisible coding that creates the image and letters you're piecing together as my words and thoughts.

So this is post one.  Welcome to the adventure, let's go on it together.